Prepare to break out the mind-blown caps, because this list of films will quite literally leave your heads spinning. After countless hours of research (watching movies), profound scrutiny (graphing the explosive expletive percentage chart) and intense deliberation (coin tossing/dartboards), THEMOVIEPOOL brings you a look at some of the most bizarre, strange, and outlandish martial arts extravaganza's in cinema history.
Six-String Samurai (1998)
Six-String Samurai is a post-apocalyptic film set in an alternate future where Russia won the Cold War by nuclear-bombing the United States. With the government gone, Elvis rules the land from "Lost Vegas". But sadly, The King has died and lacked successor to the throne. So virtuoso musicians from all over the country are traveling to the fabled city to compete to become the new King. But Death is taking out all the artists to ensure he will be King. Hero Buddy and his sidekick "Kid" are besieged on all sides as they struggle to fulfill their destinies.
With its stylized visuals and impressive fight choreography, Six-String Samurai stands as one of the strangest martial arts outings in history. Jeffery Falcon (Buddy) is most impressive in his combat prowess, especially in his katana work. The characters that populate this piece are quite colorful such as a cannibalistic "Ozzie and Harriet" family, the strange astronaut like Windmill People, the gas-mask wearing servants to The Windmill God, bowling team bounty hunters, vengeful cavemen, a Spinach Monster, and a heavy metal band led by the Slash-lookalike Death. A soundtrack primarily composed by a Russian group of rock artists called "The Red Elvises" further composes the strange, disconcerting, and ultimately awesome nature of the film.
It is the impressive fight scenes that make the bizarre nature and situations of this film acceptable. The acting is decent, especially on Falcon's behalf who never takes himself too seriously nor ever seems out of touch with his character. Six-String Samurai simply is what it is, take it or leave it. This one is tough to find, but it is out on DVD.
Dead or Alive (1999)
What can be said about the work of Takashi Miike? Quite possibly the most controversial and prolific filmmaker of the modern Japanese cinema, Miike's genius is often confused with madness or vice versa. The first in a trilogy of sorts, Dead or Alive (no connection to the video game series) follows the story of a cop and a triad boss whom meet and proceed to have various conflicts. Many of these end with some of the most extreme violence and bloodshed, a trademark of Miike's darker films.
While at first glance, Dead or Alive appears to be a run of the mill cop film, it's when the action breaks out that you begin to see this is far from anything you've seen before.
With top notch fight scenes, spectacular effects (for the time period) and concluding with a massive fight that could only belong in an edition of Street Fighter or Mortal Kombat, Dead or Alive may seem to be one of the strangest and incredible martial arts films of all time, but one must remember: it's merely another minor stop on the road map of Takashi Miike's filmmaking career.
Black Dynamite (2009)
Blaxploitation films are a dime a dozen as they gained massive prominence in the 70's. While the terminology is not slung around with much flair these days, it took the brilliance of Michael Jai White to take a stand and pay homage to the strange world that called itself 1970's martial arts films.
Playing on nearly every stereotype available, everything that oozed the 70's is here. The sets, wardrobe, props, dialogue, and even the editing techniques abound in this incredibly violent and unquestionably silly action film.
The storyline is beyond one of the most absurd you've ever conceived: "The Man" is plying the African American communities with the newest alcoholic craze, "Anaconda Malt Liquor" which when consumed in mass amounts proceeds to shrink the "working parts" to a mere shadow of its existence. The trail to find the culprit leads from the pimp and drug dealer prowled streets of L.A. to the mysterious hideout of Fiendish Doctor Wu on Kung Fu Island to the White House and President Nixon himself. The action, while stupendously incredible, is also strange, made humorous only by the brilliant dialogue throughout. Check this one out to get a taste of what you may have missed in (or to reminisce on) the decade of disco, leisure, and really bad filmmaking, the 70's.
Guyver 2: Dark Hero (1994)
Based on the anime and manga, the first Guyver film, starring Mark Hamill, did not do so well and was overall panned. While somewhat entertaining, it simply didn't capture the essence of its source material. Props go to the monster designers though, they were excellent and prove to be even better in the sequel.
The followup was far better received and was a phenomenally excellent action film (by comparison to the first). The story revolves around a local man who acquires The Guyver unit, an alien created suit of bio-armor that turns him from Joe Schmoe to the kick-ass, take-no-prisoners, near-unkillable weapon, The Guyver. Throughout the film, The Guyver, struggling to accept his new found powers and how they separate him from human society, discovers the alien origins of humanity, the ultimate purpose of The Guyver, and the true role of the Zoanoids (the monsters he must fight throughout the film). The final battle between The Guyver and the Zoanoid Guyver is one not to miss.
With fantastic action (full-suited martial arts are incredibly difficult to pull off correctly, just ask the guys who played the Turtles) decent early 90's music and some above par acting, don't worry about passing up on the first film, the sequel fills you in on everything you need to know and gets you past the fact that Mark Hamill was the best actor of the entire cast in the first one.
Riki-Oh: The Story of Ricky (1991)
Are you ready for some violence? And I mean, off-the-rails, insane, and unbelievable violence? Then Riki-Oh: The Story of Ricky is the film for you. This film as more blood and guts per capita than all of China's industries combined.
Riki-Oh is the story of a lone warrior who is imprisoned in a privatized penitentiary. He is a virtually invincible fighter who is practically immune to pain and damage. As a master of a strange kung-fu practice called "breath control" he is nearly unstoppable in combat. So, being in a prison, every psycho wants a shot at him. What follows is a flood of gore, violence, and brutally unrealistic violence that sets the pace for the entire scene. The low production values mimic those of early 60's and 70's martial arts films, but they in no way lessen the cringe factor of some scenes (meat grinder kill if you want to get a taste of it).
Though not natural in any scope, the story, characters, and outlandish abilities of the prisoners make this one of the strangest films to cross the Pacific in decades. The fight scenes are brilliant however, actor and martial arts sensation Fan Siu Wong is remarkable in his abilities and the bad guys are classic riffs on the stereotypical baddies of manga and action films. Check this one out if you can find it, but bring the Pepto if you're squeamish in any way.
Rounding out our list is the most infamous of all the films above, quite possibly the most infamous of all hardcore martial arts film. Ichi also sees Takashi Miike's second appearance on this list. But the previous film has nothing on Miike's epic masterpiece of blood, violence, sadism, depravity, and father-son relationships.
No, the guy on the front picture is not Ichi. That psycho's name is Kakihara, a sadomasochistic Yakuza enforcer who bears a Glasgow smile and enjoys receiving agony as much as he enjoys dishing it out. Ichi, noted by the huge #1 he bears as his chevron, is the world's most prolific killer. He dishes out death and violence with a mad frenzy. Problem is, when Anjo, Kakihara's boss, is suddenly kidnapped and murdered, and the #1 Killer becomes the prime suspect, what happens when the man who can take pain and the man who can dish it out meet in combat? Total freakin' war is what happens.
Though the brutal fight scenes are primarily for Ichi himself, Kakihara is the supreme villain of the piece, and the man who brings the entire bizarre world of Ichi into it's grim reality. Only the mind of Takashi Miike could bring such insanity to life, but nonetheless, it is pure entertainment. Be warned however, this film is not for the weak stomached. Watch only if you dare.
It convinced me however, that a key thing to remember when filmmaking, either as an actor or director or writer is to remain true to yourself. Takashi Miike is one proud example of never backing down or conforming to the wishes of others. What you see is what you get in his films, no questions. If you don't like it, don't watch it. It is a lesson that many filmmakers could learn from. Don't be so afraid of the people outside of your core audience that you fail to deliver the goods to the people within it. Break convention, forget the rules, and be fearless in every endeavor.
-Jarod
